Live Baby Jokes

What's worse than one dead baby nailed to ten trees?

One live baby nailed to ten trees.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

What do I do with it?

Me: "Is there a live baby in it " Him: "No." Me: "Throw it away."

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Dead Baby Jokes More Dead Baby Jokes

Why did the dead baby cross the road?

It was attached to my bumper...

What's the best thing about a dead baby?

The aftertaste.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a washing machine?

A washing machine doesn't cry when it takes a load.

What did the kangaroo say when her baby was missing?

Help! My pocket's been picked!

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

What do you throw to a drowning banjo player?

His mandolin.

What's the difference between a firstborn prince and a baseball?

A baseball is thrown to the air.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a motivational speaker and a baseball player?

The baseball player has all of its limbs.

What's the difference between an apple?

A bike because a vest has no sleeves.

Nutsack Jokes More Nutsack Jokes

When I was 3 years old I looked at my nutsack and asked my Mom "Are these my brains?

Not yet," she replied

What's the difference between a burlap sack and my nutsack?

The babies in my nutsack are still living.

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What did the bear do to be labeled a hipster?

He hibernated in the summer.

What do you call a french man who's been attacked by a bear?

Claude

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

Why doesn't Dwayne Johnson's downstairs neighbor understand references to current events?

He's been living under The Rock.

Why is the vice president always so self-obsessed?

Because he lives at the navel observatory

Subway Jokes More Subway Jokes

What do you call a barking dog riding the subway?

a sub-woofer!!!

What happens when you mix Jared from Subway and Bill Cosby?

I don't know; It was too long ago, and I can't remember.