Rectal Thermometer Jokes

How can you tell the difference between a thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste.

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What's a difference between a oral and a rectal thermometer?

The taste

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste

What's the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral thermometer?

The taste!

Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures?

Because nurses are taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.

What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?

The taste. I'll show myself out.

What is the difference between a rectal thermometer and a regular thermometer?

The taste.

Why does the Philippines ban rectal thermometers?

They cause too much brain damage.

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What's the biggest difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?

The taste.

What's the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?

Mostly the taste.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What does a hippy tell you when you ask them to leave?

Namaste

How do you confuse a polish laborer?

Lay down three shovels and tell him to take his pick.

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

What did the emu say to the nurse?

A: Mend her bones or walk the plank

How can you tell which nurse is the head nurse at a hospital?

She's the one with the dirty knees.

Thermometer Jokes More Thermometer Jokes

How are you feeling?

The thermometer responded, "0K."

How can you tell the difference between a thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste.

Brain Damage Jokes More Brain Damage Jokes

What are you watching tonight?

The game where players make enough money to risk getting brain damage, or the debate where the players already have brain damage?

Why does the Philippines ban rectal thermometers?

They cause too much brain damage.

Big Difference Jokes More Big Difference Jokes

What's the biggest difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?

The taste.

What are the two biggest differences between an alligator and a crocodile?

The spelling and pronunciation.

Teach Jokes More Teach Jokes

What do you call a person who helps teach others to fart?

A tooter. (thanks, honey)

How many beers did you have while I was gone?

Me: Two. 4-year-old: It was nine. Teaching her to count was a mistake.

Ban Jokes More Ban Jokes

What do you get when you inject human DNA into a sheep?

banned from the petting zoo...

What do you get... What do you get when you try to inject Human DNA into a goat?

Banned from the petting zoo, apparently.