How do Buddhist monks send emails?

They remove all attachments.

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How does Dalai Lama send emails?

With no attachments.

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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How many TSA agents does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. TSA agents only know how to remove clothes putting them on is different matter completely.

What's the biggest similarity between a bottle of Draino and a Danish stripper?

They both slowly remove clogs.

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Why don't Buddhists have Instagram?

They don't believe in the concept of a selfie.

What do you get if you cross a Buddhist monk and a 16 year old blonde cheerleader?

Arrested for procurement of a minor. Trust me on this one.

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Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

What do Buddhist monks have for breakfast?

Ommm' lettes!

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What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

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What kind of cards do donkeys send out near Christmas?

A: Mule-tide greetings.

Why did the dog's friends send her home from the bar when she started to act strange?

They thought she might have been slipped a woofie.