Email Jokes

How do Buddhist monks send emails?

They remove all attachments.

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Why can't you email a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are not allowed.

What is a rapper's favorite Email?

Gmail

What's the difference beetwen public official and private employee?

Private employee starts work checking email. Public official starts works making a coffee.

Why do Gypsy's walk funny?

Because of their Crystal Balls EDIT: I'm not sure if anyone's posted this before my mum's sister emailed her from across the globe.(New Zealand) I laughed so hard I thought I'd put it here. Credit goes to my Mum's sister though.

How do you email a sandwich?

In bytes.

Why are all the users of Ashley Madison worried about their emails leaking?

They will be millionaires when the Nigerian princes finish downloading the file.

This joke may have profanity.

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

Why couldn't the Buddhist monk send his mother a birthday card via email?

He had no attachments.

Why can't you email a picture to a jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

Why couldn't the depressed person get his email?

He had a bad Outlook.

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How do Itallian chefs swap emails?

By spaghett-e-mail!

Why couldn't Hillary rig the election like she rigged the DNC?

She deleted that email.

Why can't you email jokes to a jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden

How does Dalai Lama send emails?

With no attachments.

What folder do emails from histrionic venture capitalists go in?

deleted

How do you call it when you get a eMail from a Women?

FeMail.

Why did you burn that building down?

Me: Because they keep sending emails after unsubscribing. Cop: You're free to go.

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Mum Jokes More Mum Jokes

Why doesn't Oedipus swear?

Because he kisses his mum with that mouth.

What do you call a trapped fly in a frying pan of stir fry?

Your mum

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Why did you leave me here all alone?

Where o where are you tonight? Why did you leave me here all alone? I searched the world over and thought I found some one You met a zombie and pblblthpth you were gone.