How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many performance artists does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't know, I left early.

How many Amish people does it take to change a lightbulb?

A what?

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many women does it take to screw a lightbulb?

Only one, but with a perticular FETISH

How many pot heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one, we're stoned not stupid.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How do cities decide who gets to be in charge of wastewater management?

They hold a runoff election.

What's the strongest letter in the alphabet?

P*** Even Superman can't hold it.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

How do warty witches keep their hair out of place?

With scare spray.

Whatcha doing?

Me: "Going on twitter to hang out." H: "Twitter is an app, not a place." Me: *whispers venomously* "Is too a place!!"

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

How does the universe throw a party?

They planet.

Why is the Force like duct tape?

It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together.

Rotate Jokes More Rotate Jokes

What if earth rotates 30 times faster?

Interviewer:"If the Earth rotates 30 times faster, what will happen?" engineer:"We will get our salary everyday" :D Think Greedily Act Confidently

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.

Theoretical Physicist Jokes More Theoretical Physicist Jokes

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to hold it in place, another to rotate the universe around it.

How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.