How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, "How many women have you slept with?

he proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do you get when you play country music backwards?

You get your job back, you get your wife back and you get your tractor back.

How did the farmer find his wife?

He tractor down

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What are apricots?

Where monkeys sleep.

What's the difference between light and hard?

You can sleep with a light on.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Who's...(loud crash as a battering ram demolishes the front door)...there?

We're the Ferguson Police Department. We ask the questions.

What did Pitbull ask for Christmas?

Dolly.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, but I bet we could pay them less than a group of men for the same amount of work.

Why do men fart more than women?

Because women won't shut up long enough to build up the pressure.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What's a woman who always knows where her husband is?

A widow.

What did Buddy Fletcher, accused ponzi scheme runner and husband of reddit's CEO, say to the duck?

deleted

Darling Jokes More Darling Jokes

Why don't kids at school get my sarcastic humor?

Me: Because they have boring parents, darling.

What's your Mom's name?

Kid: Mom's last name must be "Darling" because that's what Daddy calls her every time.... Teacher: That's so sweet. What's her first name then? Kid: I think it's "Sorry"....

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

Why are you rushin'?

Too which I replied "Because my grandpa is from Moscow." Duh..

Which doctor?

I replied "No, a medical one."