What did the Gorilla do with the apple he was holding in his hands?

He brought it to school and said 'An Ape-lle for the teacher!'

One narcissist. The narcissist holds the lightbulb in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him.

Why doesn't democracy work in china?

Because no one wants to hold an erection.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?

A crab apple !

What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree ?

A pineapple !

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Howdo you stop a baby from running in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

How do you stop a baby from walking in circles?

Pin its other hand to the ground.

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

What do Disney movies and coathangers have in common?

They can both bring out the child from within.

What did the microbiologist bring to the art fair?

A cup of yogurt.

Gorilla Jokes More Gorilla Jokes

What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner ?

A Kong - vict !

What did Mrs Revere say when Paul got on a gorilla to warn the farmers that the British were coming?

Paul stop monkeying around!

School Jokes More School Jokes

What's updog?

Mom: Just waking you up for school, dog, what's up wit u Dad (from hallway): OWNED

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's ok, he woke up.

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

What happened when the black man went to night school?

The teacher marked him absent.

Why can't geometry teachers tell good jokes?

They go off on tangents.

Ape Lle Jokes More Ape Lle Jokes

When the lumberjacks sawed down the tree where did the Gorilla hiding in the uppermost branches land?

Nearby - the Ape-lle doesn't fall far from the tree!