What do elephants in the zoo get for lunch?

Half an hour, just like the rest of the animals.

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Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

Why were the elephants thrown out of the swimming pool ?

Because they couldn't hold their trunks up !

What happened when the joker dropped an elephant carrying a ten ton weight on Batman and Robin?

They became flatman and ribbon. has left the building.

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

What do you get when you have Tiger Woods, Stephen Hawking, and Dwayne Johnson in the same room?

An Animal, a Vegetable, and a Mineral.

What did people start calling the medical school that allowed animals to study medicine?

The hippocampus.

Rest Jokes More Rest Jokes

How many members of an ethnicity does it take to perform a specified task?

A finite number! One member to perform the task, and the rest to behave in a manner stereotypical to the ethnicity in question.

What are the strongest days of the week?

Saturday and Sunday...the rest are weekdays.

Lunch Jokes More Lunch Jokes

When were you most satisfied at your last job?

Me: After lunch, next question.

What is that you're having for lunch?

Me: fruit salad H: That's funny, it looks like a sangria. Me: huh, weird *sips fruit salad*

Zoo Jokes More Zoo Jokes

What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film?

Stop playing it cagey!

Why are gorillas so noisy?

A: They were raised in a zoo!

Half Hour Jokes More Half Hour Jokes

Why does a man only get half-hour lunch-breaks?

So his boss doesn't have to retrain him.

What is the difference between a woman and a washing machine?

You don't have to hug a washing machine half an hour after it finishes