What do you give a kid with no hands for Christmas?

Doesnt matter, he'll never unwrap the gift

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why do Mormon women stop having kids at 29?

Because 30 is too many!

Where can you always find kids by themselves?

edit: i forgot to say please.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did the testicle say to the other testicle?

Between you and me, I think something's up." I'm slightly tipsy, this is probably a terrible joke. Merry Christmas!

What did the deaf, blind, mute, handicapped kid get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Gift Jokes More Gift Jokes

What does Brown Santa say?

Gifts only for little girls with A's, B's and C's because the other ones already have the D's."

What gift do you want?

HUSBAND: "An English girl." After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: "Where is my gift " WIFE: "Wait for nine months!"

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?

A mechanic.

What did the pavement smoother say after he lost his hands?

I literally can't even."

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

Why did Bill Nye crash his car?

Because inertia is a property of matter.

How many jail guards does it take to change a light bulb?

Why does it matter Everyone knows the prison system can't change anything.

Unwrap Jokes More Unwrap Jokes

What do you get if you cross a vampire and a mummy ?

Something you wouldn't want to unwrap !

Why did Burger King decide to partner with Dairy Queen instead of McDonalds?

Because she unwrapped his Whopper. I'm so sorry!!!