Why did you cancel your gym membership?

Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with

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Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many kidnapped children does it take to change a lightbulb?

The parents would love to know.

How many Mormons does it take to change a lightbulb?

Ten. One to actually change the lightbulb and nine to bring refreshments

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What do people in Prague call abortions?

Canceled Czechs

Why did you cancel your gym membership?

Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with

Vend Machine Jokes More Vend Machine Jokes

What does a vending machine and Monica Lewinsky have in common?

They both say "Insert Bill Here"

Why did the soda can quit its job at the vending machine?

It was soda pressing.

Vend Jokes More Vend Jokes

What's black and steals your change?

Vending machines.

Why are most rappers afraid of vending machines?

Because eminem's in there (Sorry, it works better when it's spoken)

Agree Jokes More Agree Jokes

What's the only thing the English and French agree on?

Americans. Alternatives: What's the only thing Americans and the French agree on? The English. What's the only thing the English and Americans agree on? The French.

Why buy expensive fireworks when you can make your own with ordinary household chemicals?

I said, and the other patients in the ER agreed.

Gym Membership Jokes More Gym Membership Jokes

Why did the zombie get a gym membership?

Gaaaainsss

Why are gym memberships illegal?

Because of the Free Exercise Clause.