1st Jokes

How does John Marston take a shower?

1st he gets nice and wet, then he dies of drowning

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Whats the different between falling from the 10th floor and falling from the 1st floor ?

The sound you make 10th floor " AHHHHHHHHH " 1st floor " AHHHHHHHHHH "

What's the difference between someone falling from 21st floor and 1st floor?

21st floor person goes: AHHHHHHHHHH 1st floor goes: AHHHHHHHHHH

Why did the skull win 1st place in the race?

Because he ran ahead.

How do you jump out of a fifteen-floors building without getting hurt?

You jump from the 1st one.

What's the difference between falling from the 1st and 10th floor?

Falling from the 1st floor: SPLAT! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Falling from the 10th floor: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! SPLAT!

Why did the cops show up at the elementary school?

A 1st grader was resisting a rest.

What's the difference between a guy falling from the 20th or the 1st floor of a building?

20th floor fall goes: *Aaaaaah, BAM!* 1st floor fall goes: *BAM, Aaaaah!*

What is the difference between falling from the 1st floor and from the 10th floor?

1st floor : Splat, aaaaaahhh 10th floor: aaaaahhhh, Splat

Who's that?

Darth Vader." "Was he 1 of Jesus disciples " "I dunno, I've only seen the 1st movie."

Why does it take longer to get from 1st to 2nd base, than it does to get from 2nd to 3rd base?

Because there’s a Shortstop in between!

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University Jokes More University Jokes

Why your oven doesn't attend an university?

It already has at least hundred degrees

What subject did the Warlock major in at University?

Fel-osophy

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Where do you want to be buried?

Me: You mean after I die, right

Why do so many American kids die in school shootings?

They're not allowed to run in the halls.

January 1st Jokes More January 1st Jokes

Why shouldn't you kiss someone on January 1st?

because its the first date

What is the most popular birthday based on Internet records?

January 1st, 1993

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?

None, he fell.

How did the blonde die raking leaves?

She fell out of the tree.

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

What's it called when a T-Rex hurts itself?

A dino-sore

What's love?

Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!

Bam Jokes More Bam Jokes

What's the difference between a guy falling from the 20th or the 1st floor of a building?

20th floor fall goes: *Aaaaaah, BAM!* 1st floor fall goes: *BAM, Aaaaah!*

Why do teachers use a bamboo cane?

Because when the cane goes 'bam' the child goes boo!

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

Why does Mexico never win the Olympics?

Because anyone who can run, jump, or swim already left.

How does a sloth hang itself?

By trying to jump rope.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why did the scientist take off his doorbell?

because he wanted to win the "Nobel" prize!

What has four legs and goes meow?

A crocodile. -You won !"