Asphalt Jokes

What's the road construction worker's equivalent of a plumbers crack?

An asphalt

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What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike?

The asphalt.

Who should of gotten asphalt?

Cleopatra.

What do you need to do after burning your balls on the asphalt of a dead end street?

You need to cul de sac.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What did airport security tell the Dentist?

We need to give you a cavity search

Why did the fish's car break down?

It needed a tuna-up.

Cleopatra Jokes More Cleopatra Jokes

What did Julius Caesar say after taking Cleopatra's virginity?

Veni, Vidi... Veni.

Why was Marc Antony still interested in Cleopatra even when she's just had a baby?

Because it was delivered via Ceasarion section

Cul De Sac Jokes More Cul De Sac Jokes

Why was the Boy having trouble finding power in the Cul-de-sac?

There was no outlet

What do you call it when your balls are in the street?

It's Cul de sac!

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

What did you learn in school today Son: How to write Mother: What did you write?

Son: I don't know they haven't taught us how to read yet!

What is the first nursery rhyme blondes learn in primary school?

A. Hump me dump me!!

Bike Jokes More Bike Jokes

What's the difference between a man in plain clothes riding a unicycle and a man in a tuxedo riding a bike?

Attire

Why shouldn't you laugh when a black man falls off his bike?

It could be your bike. EDIT: Spelling.

Plumber Jokes More Plumber Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a physicist and a plumber?

Ask them to say the word 'unionized'.

How can you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

You ask them to pronounce unionize.

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup?

A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.

What did one candle say to the other?

Don't birthdays burn you up "

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

Whats bigger than your balls?

The moon

What does Bill Cosby have in common with a Pokemon trainer?

He makes sure his catch is weak before he throws his balls at them.