Asphalt Jokes

What's the road construction worker's equivalent of a plumbers crack?

An asphalt

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike?

The asphalt.

Who should of gotten asphalt?

Cleopatra.

What do you need to do after burning your balls on the asphalt of a dead end street?

You need to cul de sac.

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Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

What is another word for children who haven't learned how to do math?

yesallwomen

What do you call a dress that refuses to learn?

Clothes-minded.

Hard Thing Jokes More Hard Thing Jokes

What is the hardest thing to do after starting a family?

Ending them.

What is the hardest thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

You have to drop the bomb on her twice before she gets it. I'm going to hell..

Plumber Jokes More Plumber Jokes

How do you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

One of them makes crack while the other just markets it.

What's the difference between a plumber and a scientist?

Pronounce this word: unionized

Cleopatra Jokes More Cleopatra Jokes

What did Octavian say when he stormed Cleopatra's gardens?

Caesar salad

What did Caesar say to Cleopatra ?

Toga-ether we can rule the world !

Cul De Sac Jokes More Cul De Sac Jokes

Why was the Boy having trouble finding power in the Cul-de-sac?

There was no outlet

What do you need to do after burning your balls on the asphalt of a dead end street?

You need to cul de sac.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why is the white girl so odd?

Because she can't even. I'll be over in /r/dadjokes if you need me.

What do you need to split a photon?

A lightsabre

Ride Jokes More Ride Jokes

What is a Siths favorite thing to ride in?

An elevader.

Where in the hell are Dora the Explorer's parents?

Do they know she's riding a damn crocodile into a volcano

Bike Jokes More Bike Jokes

Why did the fish fall off it's bike?

It's a fish.

Why couldn't the bike stand up on its own?

It was two-tired. *Slaps knee* *Prosthetic leg falls off*