Bilbo Jokes

Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings?

Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.

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How did Bilbo survive the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

What do you call a pompous Hobbit?

Bilbo Braggins

How does Bilbo take his tea?

Bag-in

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Why did the rapper die after being shot?

He forgot 2pac his bullet proof vest

Why did the man that drank 10 cups of poisoned Lipton not die?

He drank so much poison it built his immuni-tea.

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What do you call an Irish snake in Lord of the Rings?

Legolas

Why is God depressed?

Imagine...*You* Being God, the Lord, Him... But imagine us.

Survive Jokes More Survive Jokes

What human organ would survive the longest in the hunger games?

The liver

What do you call a soldier who's survived mustard gas and pepper spray?

A seasoned veteran.

Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

How is the world like a bag of jellybeans?

Nobody likes the black ones.

What will I have at the end of the day?

Three bags of skittles and a small body to hide.

Hobbit Jokes More Hobbit Jokes

What do you call a smelly Hobbit?

Frodor.

What do 8 hobbits make?

A hobbyte.

Old Hobbit Jokes More Old Hobbit Jokes

Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings?

Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.

Why did Bilbo Baggins die with a Erection?

Because old hobbits die hard. (Just a different Punchline)

Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

What do you get when OP gets erections?

QR

What kind of erection does a burn victim get?

Firewood.

Old Hobbits Jokes More Old Hobbits Jokes

Why did Bilbo Baggins live for so long?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

How did Bilbo survive the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy?

Because old Hobbits die hard...