Bond Mature Jokes

Whats the difference between a man and a government bond?

The bond matures.

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What's the difference between a government bond and a man?

The bond matures.*

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man get for winning the muscle relaxing contest?

Atrophy!

How are men like carpet tiles?

If you lay them properly the first time around you can walk all over them for the rest of your life.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

How do the Lannisters save money on new beds?

They push Two twins together to make a King

Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket?

Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What do children think of the world?

I don't know, this is the first time I've logged onto Reddit, today.

How many Super Saiyans does it take to change a light-bulb?

It's not &gt9000) FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGGGGON BAAAAL ZEEEEEEEEE

Begin Jokes More Begin Jokes

What does every funeral begin with?

fun!

What word begins with M and ends in arriage and is a mans favourite thing?

A: Miscarriage This joke never gets old, just like the baby.

Guitar Player Jokes More Guitar Player Jokes

What's the difference between a guitar player and a pizza?

A pizza can feed a family of four.

How do you get the guitar player off of your porch?

Pay for the pizza.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between arguing with a girl and arguing with a knife?

The knife has a point

Whats the difference between reddit and 9gag?

3 hours, but it takes 1 day for it to get to Hot

Mature Jokes More Mature Jokes

What's the difference between men and government bonds?

Bonds mature.

What is a Mature man who likes young women?

An Inmate

Earn Jokes More Earn Jokes

Why did the scarecrow earn an achievement award?

He was outstanding in his field

What must a vampire earn to learn to fly?

His red wings.