Government Bond Jokes

Whats the difference between a man and a government bond?

The bond matures.

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What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds?

Government bonds mature over time and earn money

What's the difference between a government bond and a man?

The bond matures.*

What's the difference between men and government bonds?

Bonds mature.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner?

A. A power failure.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with, "A man once told me..."

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between LinkedIn and McDonald's?

McDonald's knows how to use salt

What's the difference between a TV and a newspaper?

Ever tried swatting a fly with a TV?

Earn Jokes More Earn Jokes

How does a fencer earn their karma?

Ripostes.

Why did the scarecrow earn a promotion?

Because it was outstanding in its field

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

When the hell did you grow a beard?

Me: This morning. On the way here. Just felt like it was time.

What kind of watch is best for people who don't like time on their hands?

A pocket watch.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What will you be using the money for?

Me: "A divorce lawyer."

What shall we do with all these letters begging for money?

the woman asks her husband. "Keep sending them!"

Bond Mature Jokes More Bond Mature Jokes

What's the difference between a government bond and a man?

The bond matures.*

Whats the difference between a man and a government bond?

The bond matures.

Mature Jokes More Mature Jokes

What's the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond?

Eventually the savings bond will mature and begin to earn money.

What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds?

Government bonds mature over time and earn money

Bond Jokes More Bond Jokes

What type of bonds deals with the bad guys?

James

Who's there ! Bond ! Bond who ?

Bond to succeed !