Dead Giveaway Jokes

What's the definition of a will?

It's a dead giveaway.

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Why don't you have to pay for the items on a will?

It's a dead giveaway...

How do you define a will?

Hint: It's a dead giveaway.

Why don't undertakers provide free services?

That would be a dead giveaway.

What do you call a will?

a dead giveaway

What is a dead giveaway someone has no idea what they are doing?

They have an engineering degree.

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Idea Jokes More Idea Jokes

What did the ant whisper into the elephant's ear that made the elephant faint?

I'm going to be the mother of your children." I have no idea whether the joke is lost in translation...

What's The Pink Panther's favourite type of jacket?

No idea." "Denim." "Denim " "Denim denim denim denim denim..."

Provide Jokes More Provide Jokes

How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one provided there's a programmer around to explain how to do it.

How does a Syrian family have a meal?

The men provide the food and the women do the cooking, leaving the children to wash up afterwards.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why didn't the pig have to pay for drinks on the cruise?

A: It was all-oink-lusive.

What's the diffrence between a Chickpea and a Gorbanzo bean?

I woun't pay a 100 bucks for a Gorbanzo bean on my face.

Definition Jokes More Definition Jokes

What's the definition of a healthy virgin?

A: "One who has never been bed-ridden!"

What's the definition of Polystyrene?

A plastic parrot!

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Which came first. . . social media or dumb people?

AND which is worse. . . the overdoing of selfies OR not knowing how to use the English language

What do a Catholic Priest and second place have in common?

They both came in a little behind.

Item Jokes More Item Jokes

Why don't you have to pay for the items on a will?

It's a dead giveaway...

Where can you find the best Black Friday deals with items at 100% off?

Ferguson!

Define Jokes More Define Jokes

How would you define yourself?

ME: *don't let her know you're a delicious chocolate cake* Moist

How many philosophers does it take to... ...change a light bulb?

Define "light bulb".

Undertaker Jokes More Undertaker Jokes

What is an Undertaker's favorite element?

Barium.

What is the similarity between a cough syrup and an undertaker?

They both take away the coffin.