Heinz Jokes

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Coffee Mug

Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?

I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup " So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.

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Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

What do you call a row of trucks covered in mozzarella?

A cheesy pickup line

Why was the Chinese Journey cover band a failure?

Their only hit was Don't Stop Bereaving.

Walter White Jokes More Walter White Jokes

Why did Walter White not pay for his pizza?

Because it was on the house.

What direction does a Walter White-themed GPS tell you to turn?

Goddamn right.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What would you do if you won the lottery?

Two friends meet together and one asks: What would you do if you won the lottery? -I would build a brothel! Oh, and if it went wrong and you loose money? -I'd open it to the public

Why did the army's craftsman enact a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Policy?

He didn't want any glaze in the military

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call people who worship paper bags?

Sack religious

Why did the terrorist cross the road?

To send people to the other side.

2020 Jokes More 2020 Jokes

Why do people keep asking me what I'm going to be doing in three years?

I don't have 2020 vision.

Who do you see winning the presidency in 4 years?

I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the pirate tell his littler sister when she asked if she could hold his parrot?

ISIS

What do you get if you are telling puns while jogging?

A running joke.

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What do you call a pig with three eyes ?

Piiig

Why do Russian police officers always work in groups of three?

One of them can read, and one of them can write. The third one is there to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

it's must-up ..

What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher?

Would you like ketchup with your chips