Holy Water Jokes

Two friends meet together and one asks: What would you do if you won the lottery? -I would build a brothel! Oh, and if it went wrong and you loose money? -I'd open it to the public

Why should every woman know a C++ programmer?

Because they'll always let friends access their private members. Ba dum tiss.

Bless Jokes More Bless Jokes

Why wouldn't Pope Pius bless any helicopters when they were first manufactured?

Because whenever one started up, the big blades would go "wop...wop... wop" and the little blades would go "guineaguineaguinea".

How do priests make holy water?

They bless the hell out of it.

Boil Jokes More Boil Jokes

Why was Easter the aardvark's favorite holiday?

Because he liked aard-boiled eggs!

What's the difference between Frankenstein and boiled potatoes?

You can't mash Frankenstein.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What do eskimos do when it gets cold?

They go into their igloos and sit around a candle. What do they do when it gets even colder They turn on the candle.

What did the bishop say to the priest?

It's my turn.

Religious Movement Jokes More Religious Movement Jokes

What do you get when you mix castor oil with holy water?

A religious movement.

What do you get when you cross Holy Water with castor oil?

A religious movement!

Nun Jokes More Nun Jokes

Why does it take so long for a nun to get her clothes?

It takes 21 days to make a habit.

What do you call a nun that sleep-walks?

a) A Roamin' Catholic b) An unconscious habit

Tap Water Jokes More Tap Water Jokes

What's a dancer's favorite type of water?

Tap water

How do you turn tap water into holy water?

You boil the HELL out of it! Har har har.