Illegal Immigrant Jokes

What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants?

E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home.

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Why was the illegal immigrant so offensive?

Because he crossed the line

What do you call a fight between a child molester and an illegal immigrant?

Alien versus Predator.

What Do You Call A Fight Between An Illegal Immigrant And A Child Molester?

Alien vs. Predator

What's the difference between a feminist and an illegal immigrant?

The illegal immigrant knows how to cook.

Where do most illegal immigrants go in America?

Allah-bama.

Why... Can't illegal US immigrants play Uno?

Because they keep stealing all the Green Cards

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Line Jokes More Line Jokes

What do you call a line of rabbits walking backwards?

A receding hare line.

What's black and white stinks and hangs from a line?

A drip dry skunk.

Cook Jokes More Cook Jokes

Why is steak harder to cook than spinach?

It takes a lot more thyme to accomplish.

What My Friend Said Once They Discovered The Existence of Gravitational Waves?

Friend: Good, now they will make microwaves that cook my chicken fingers faster. Say what now

Uno Jokes More Uno Jokes

Why can't fashion designers play uno?

Because they always draw a cardigan.

Why do people hate playing uno with Mexicans?

They keep stealing green cards.

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

What do you call a reptile who anyways starts fights?

An Insti-Gator

What is the first rule of Womans fight club?

Never tell anyone what are you so mad about

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What do you call it when seven minutes in heaven is played at Comic-Con?

A: Close encounters of the nerd kind

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball against each other?

Juan v Juan

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get if you cross a bike and a rose ?

Bicycle petals !

What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant?

A: A mad scientist.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Where does the pervert keep the underwear he steals?

In his briefcase!

How many moths does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just two, but how they get in there.. I don't know. (Stolen from an old Maxim in my dad's storage)

Allah Bama Jokes More Allah Bama Jokes

Where do most illegal immigrants go in America?

Allah-bama.

What U.S. state was founded by Muslims?

Allah-bama