Kosher Jokes

What is less Kosher than a bacon wrapped shrimp?

A communion wafer

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What do you call Kosher ice?

Iceberg

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Iceberg Jokes More Iceberg Jokes

What's the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush?

One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!

What do you get when an epileptic person fights an iceberg with a sword?

Seizure Salad

Shrimp Jokes More Shrimp Jokes

Why don't shrimp give anything to charity?

Because they're shellfish.

Why did the marriage between the crab and the shrimp end in a divorce?

Because they were both too Shellfish.

Bacon Jokes More Bacon Jokes

What do Kermit The Frog'S fingers smell like?

Bacon.

What is green and smells like bacon?

Kermit's fingers

Kevin Bacon Jokes More Kevin Bacon Jokes

Why does Kevin Bacon not get more leading roles in Hollywood?

Because it's not kosher. http://36.media.tumblr.com/cb0ad7dd38767e0fc2363665afdb5cdd/tumblrinlinentae7hsEL21tw80r81280.jpg

What did Hannibal Lector have for breakfast?

Kevin Bacon. ... And Jon Hamm. I'll show myself out.

Hollywood Jokes More Hollywood Jokes

What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film?

Stop playing it cagey!

Which Hollywood actress has made sure all sci-fi movies like alien; ghostbusters; avatar & chappie are "woven" together?

Sigourney "Weaver" :P

Acidic Juice Jokes More Acidic Juice Jokes

Why do orthodox rabbis like lemonade so much?

Because, it's acidic juice.

What do you call an unsweetened, kosher lemonade?

acidic juice

Wrap Jokes More Wrap Jokes

What did the psychiatrist say to the crazy naked guy wrapped in cellophane?

Clearly, I can see your nuts.

What's better than a tall woman wrapping her legs around you?

A short woman trying like hell.