Marine Biologist Jokes

What do you get if you cross a soldier and a scientist?

A marine biologist.

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What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?

One wags it's tail, while the other tags a whale

What did the Marine Biologist say when he saw two eels making love?

It's a Moray."

Why did the marine biologist jump off a bridge?

He lost his porpoise in life.

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Porpoise Jokes More Porpoise Jokes

What do philosophical dolphins say?

What's the porpoise?

What kinds of stories do dolphins tell around the campfire?

They're just ghost stories for all in tents and porpoises.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross weed with weed?

You get high.

Why'd the Mexican cross the road?

He took the chicken's job.

Eel Jokes More Eel Jokes

What did the Marine Biologist say when he saw two eels making love?

It's a Moray."

What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why did the doctor make an old woman cry?

He lost his patients

How do fireflies lose weight?

They burn calories.

Wag Jokes More Wag Jokes

What's the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?

One wags it's tail, while the other tags a whale

Why are dogs bad at poker?

Because they wag their tails whenever they have a good hand. Why did John's dog win the poker tournament Because he's a Doberman.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a brothel and a circus?

Your mother never ran away to join the circus.

What is the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian Tenor?

A: About 10 pounds.

Biologist Jokes More Biologist Jokes

What did you think of the chapter on frogs?

Biologist 2: Oh it was quite ribbiting.

How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.

Marine Jokes More Marine Jokes

What do you feel when you shoot a terrorist?

The Marine shrugged and replied, "Recoil."

Why do they carry Marines around on Naval ships?

Because sheep would be too obvious.