National Anthem Jokes

How do you stop all the protests and riots?

Play the national anthem. They'll all sit down

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Why does everyone hate 7?

Because 7 kneeled during the National Anthem.

How do you get a Criminal to stop running?

Play the national anthem

What's the national anthem of Puerto Rico?

Attention K-Mart shoppers..."

How did the dyslexic American mathematician sing the first line of his national anthem?

Oh secant, you say "

What does the NFL season and the national anthem have in common?

Kaepernick is gonna sit through them both.

How can the National Anthem be racist if?

The first words are, " Jose can you see "

What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the national anthem are?

A: Play ball.

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What's a Cuban's favorite song?

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What is the Puerto Rican national anthem?

Row row row your boat

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Why don't Mexicans blow their noses?

So that they have something to pick in the off-season.

How many seasons are there in a dogs life ?

Just one the moulting season !

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How do you stop a 200 pound hamster from charging?

Take away it's credit cards.

How is a computer like an air conditioner?

They both stop working properly when you open windows.

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How many black people does it take to start a riot?

How many black people do you need to start a riot?

Negative 1.

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How can Ozzy Osbourne possibly sing that?

when Tony Iommi is standing right next to him, alive and well.

Why did the girl who worked for the telephone company sing all the time?

Because she was an operetta (operator).

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Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature?

Because the spray paint can wasn't invented until 1949.

What did the Puerto Rican dish say when he lost his Android?

Where'd mofongo?

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How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words ;)

What do you call a woodland elf without any connecting plastic bricks to play with?

Legolas

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What do you do if an elephant swallows you whole?

Run around until you get pooped out. :)

What do you call a midget psychic running from the cops?

A small medium at large!