Newton Jokes

Why Newton laws were not from Asian countries?

Because they have durian...

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Why did Newton's wife got pregnant?

Because he doesn't believe in using quantum

What do you call a baby panther?

a Newton.

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Bury Jokes More Bury Jokes

Why is it illegal for a person living in Virginia to be buried in Texas?

because they're still alive.

How do you bury a pothead?

Coughin'

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What is loud and sounds like an apple?

AN APPLE!**

How do you get the most apples at Halloween?

Take a snorkel.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a barrel rider, and a can of Copenhagen?

You can only fit 3 fingers in a can of Copenhagen.

What's the difference between Politicians and Thieves?

Thief: They steal your money then run Politician: They run and then steal your money

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

Where can you go to pick up black birds?

The crow bar

Why is there cotton on top of the pills inside a pill bottle?

To remind black people they picked cotton before they sold drugs.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why Did the Native Americans Car Break Down?

Their Injun died on them!

Why did the calendar die?

It's days were numbered.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What did the woman say while she was having a baby?

This could use some salt."

Why should all teenagers get a case for their cell phones?

Because they should use protection to practice safe text

Wine Jokes More Wine Jokes

Where do you store your wine?

In the cabernet

What was the old lady's favourite type of wine?

Why don't you ever take me to Florida " Courtesy of my Nana.

Crumble Jokes More Crumble Jokes

What does Cam Newton and Fig Newton have in common?

They both crumble under pressure

What's the difference between Belgian waffles and American waffles?

Belgium waffles crumble in the hands of German.