Opinion Jokes

What's your opinion on birds?

Well, they're pretty fly if you ask me.

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What's the difference between Pizza and your opinion?

I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes

What do you get when you mix pie and onions?

Opinions!

What do you call a woman with an opinion?

Wrong.

What did Wiz Khalifa say when he was asked his opinion on the dress?

Yeah, uh huh, you know what it is."

What do the Egyptians call a man who cannot keep his opinions to himself?

IMHOtep

What's your opinion on the mobius strip debate?

I find it a tad one-sided.

When the Little Mermaid became human how did she know how to use a toilet?

BIG-TIME plot hole in my opinion"

What is your opinion on women making 75% of a man's wages for the same job?

I said "Congratulations!!!"

What do you call a Muslim woman with an opinion?

A corpse.

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Egyptians Jokes More Egyptians Jokes

Why did the Egyptians build the pyramids?

To get to the other side.

Who do Egyptians pray to when the public transportation breaks down?

Anubis (If you don't get it, say it slower.)

Stoner Jokes More Stoner Jokes

How did the stoner die?

Blunt force trauma.

Why do stoners love couches?

Because of their 'cush'ions!

Admire Jokes More Admire Jokes

Why did the stoner admire himself in the mirror everyday?

Because he has a high opinion of himself

Why do people admire pirates so much?

They have nerves of steal.

Pie Jokes More Pie Jokes

Whats the worst joke you can play on an American?

Two pies to the face and one somewhere in a field in Pennsylvania.

Where do you weigh pies?

Somewhere over a rainbow...

Agree Jokes More Agree Jokes

What did Daredevil say after begrudgingly agreeing with The Punisher's brutally honest opinion that he's just a half-measure?

You're such a Frank Castle."

Why does everyone agree when you judge someone's voice?

Because you make sound judgement.

Corpse Jokes More Corpse Jokes

What's it called when two morticians argue for hours on who gets to bang a corpse?

A stalemate.

What do you call a Muslim woman with an opinion?

A corpse.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why was he woman arrested on a cattle ranch for wearing a silk dress?

She was charged with rustling!

Why do women make bad engineers?

Their whole lives they have been told 5 inches is 8

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why does the U.S. Navy use powdered soap?

It takes longer to pick up.

Where're you going?

Me: To dinner with my friends! Mom: Your friends Me: I'm going to use McDonalds' free Wifi to get on twitter...