Ounce Jokes

How do people in other countries tell if kids are using drugs?

Here in the U.S. we just ask them how many grams are in an ounce.

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What is the difference between an ounce of cocaine and an infant?

Eric Clapton would absolutely NEVER let an ounce of cociane fall 49 stories out a window onto the streets of New York.

What's the difference between a baby and an ounce of Coke?

Eric Clapton would never drop an ounce of Coke out of a window

Why was the CEO of Pepsi fired?

They caught him with an ounce of coke in his system.

What's the pound's new name?

The ounce

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Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What's worse than dropping your ice cream?

The Holocaust.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream?

Because the bus hit him.

Country Jokes More Country Jokes

What's a Mexican's favourite sport?

Cross country

Which country do doctors hate?

any

People Jokes More People Jokes

How many people with OCD does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. It *has* to be seven.

What do you call someone who lets people rent wifi signals from them?

The lanlord!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between a house cat and a polecat ?

How much their husbands make

What's the difference between a motivational speaker and a baseball player?

The baseball player has all of its limbs.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What playground equipment do kids hate the most?

The slide into poverty.

What do you call a puppy in the desert?

Anyone else got some fun jokes your kids have told you?

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if your "designer clothes" are made in China?

If they look fabric-cated Very bad, I know. "This is why we don't have friends!!"

How can you tell a Minnesota hockey fan?

Ask him what color the blue line is and wait. It may take him ten minutes to answer.

Gram Jokes More Gram Jokes

How do people in other countries tell if kids are using drugs?

Here in the U.S. we just ask them how many grams are in an ounce.

How much is a gram?

Me- "Depends on what you want" Teacher- "Out, just get out"

49 Jokes More 49 Jokes

Why is Bernie Sanders challenging his 49 vs 50% loss in Iowa?

I thought he didn't care about the 1%

What is the difference between an ounce of cocaine and an infant?

Eric Clapton would absolutely NEVER let an ounce of cociane fall 49 stories out a window onto the streets of New York.