Disgrace Jokes

What would happen if James Bond took Viagra?

He would continue to be a state-sponsored terrorist whose actions disgrace us all.

This joke may have profanity.

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What do read heads get when they don't brush their teeth?

Gingervitis Edit: redheads. I am a disgrace.

Why is it good that accordionists have a half-ounce more brains than horses?

A: So they don't disgrace themselves in parades.

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Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What's the program jedi use to read pdf files?

Adobe wan kenobi

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

What do horses drink at the bar?

Chardon-neigh

What did Paul Revere say when he got on his horse?

Giddy up horsey !

Act Jokes More Act Jokes

How did the florist act after getting her dream job?

Got so excited she wet her plants.

How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb a tree and act like a nut.

Brush Jokes More Brush Jokes

What do you call thrusting a hairy rod in and out of your mouth really fast then afterwards spitting out a white liquid?

Brushing your teeth

How many pollocks does it take to paint a house?

1 to hold the brush and 1000 to turn the house!

Age Jokes More Age Jokes

Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent?

Because they contain a lot of fowl language.

What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house?

Mortgage freeman.

Parade Jokes More Parade Jokes

What do You Call a Line... Q: What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?

A: a receding hare-line.

How many gears does a French Tank have?

5. 4 reverse and 1 forward for parades.

Birthday Jokes More Birthday Jokes

What's the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?

Get married on his birthday.

What did the janitor get for his birthday?

A urinal cake.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What did the doctor say to the prosecutor?

You're trying my patients!

What's white in the morning, white in the afternoon and white in the evening?

An Irishman trying to get a tan.