Race Car Jokes

Why did everyone turn away when the race car drove past?

It had a SPOILER on it.

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What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

What's the difference between a race car and a woman?

One costs a lot of money to maintain, keep running, and give you the results you want. The other has four wheels.

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What's a Sikh's favourite kind of joke?

A Nanak Nanak joke.

What does a redneck and yeast have in common?

They are both "in-bread" Downvote me to hell if you want. This is my only joke.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison?

A Buffa-Loan!

What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg?

Between the two of us we can make a lot of money.

Finish Jokes More Finish Jokes

What do I have in common with Franz Kafka?

Neither of us have finished The Castle.

What was Mark Hamill's reaction when he finished reading The Force Awakens script?

Speechless

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What do race car drivers wear under their fire retardant suits?

Speedos !

What does Sonic the Hedgehog wear when he goes to the beach?

A speedo

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

How do you get a little old lady to yell the F word?

Get another little old lady to yell "Bingo!"

How many acrobats does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change it and one to yell "Ta-daa!" when he's done.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

How do you pick up older Spanish women?

Hola Seniority

How would you describe your past work?

Cut to me picking up coins off sidewalks and taking them to CoinStar -Change management.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What do you call a promiscuous woman who travels a lot?

Abroad.

What did the author of The Lord Of The Rings say after he completed his books?

If you like dialogue, theres a whole lot of Tolkein.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why'd the crazy guy jump out of the hot air balloon's basket?

He wanted to escape from the ballooney bin.

Why did the man sleep under the tractor?

Because he wanted to wake up oily.