Result Jokes

What does the result of this election and Netflix have in common?

Orange is the new Black

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What two words result in the most marriages?

Screw it. EDIT: has a better answer lol

What's the difference between a race car and a woman?

One costs a lot of money to maintain, keep running, and give you the results you want. The other has four wheels.

What's the definition of irony?

An incongruity between expectation and result.

What will the results of the next election be?

No one knows! The results were stolen from the Politburo just last night!

What is the difference between a BMW and a baby carriage?

The baby carriage is the result of last year's fun on wheels.

What did the doctor tell the panda bear after the results of his child's paternity test came back?

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the results are a bit grizzly.

What is the best definition of irony?

irony irne/ noun a state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often amusing as a result.

Who is the brother of Juan Luna?

Edi si AnTWOnio Luna. Yeah yeah, the result of being stuck in the traffic. XD

What is the result?

A tie.

What's the similarity between your zero-exercise lifestyle and a professional weight-lifter competing in the Olympics?

They both involve muscles and they both result in a-trophy.

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How many retarded Italian gardeners does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: One but don't expect results.

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Maintain Jokes More Maintain Jokes

Why do health magazines targeting hypochondriacs have so much trouble maintaining subscriber levels?

Because none of their readers believe them when they receive a warning that it's their final issue.

What's the difference between a race car and a woman?

One costs a lot of money to maintain, keep running, and give you the results you want. The other has four wheels.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Why did the doctor quit his job?

He ran out of patients.

What did the doctor say to the strange beer that walked into his clinic?

What ails you?

Irony Jokes More Irony Jokes

What is irony?

When the last person you want to see is the last person you see.

What do you call it when a blacksmith makes something white?

Irony.

New Black Jokes More New Black Jokes

Why were all the oompa loompas black in Willy Wonka &amp the Chocolate Factory?

Because Orange is the New Black.

What do you call a show about The Donald winning the presidency?

Orange is the New Black

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why is the all-seeing eye the symbol of the occult?

Because they want us all under super-vision!

Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?

Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a gun?

Guns don't move out when you bring a new one home.

What's the difference between Iron Man And Iron Woman?

Iron Man is a superhero, Iron Woman is a command.

Race Car Jokes More Race Car Jokes

What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

What's the difference between a race car and a woman?

One costs a lot of money to maintain, keep running, and give you the results you want. The other has four wheels.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What happened when the monster stole a bottle of perfume?

He was convicted of fragrancy.

What do you call a stolen tamole?

A hot tamole