Roman Soldier Jokes

What did the roman soldier say after crucifying Jesus?

Nailed it

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What is the time ?

2nd Roman Soldier: XX past VII !

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Roman Jokes More Roman Jokes

What do Romans use to cut their pizza?

Little Caesars.

Why was the dieting Roman so thrilled?

His toga size went from L to XL.

Season Veteran Jokes More Season Veteran Jokes

Why did the Romans pay their soldiers in salt?

So they would end up with seasoned veterans.

What do you call a soldier who survived pepper spray and mustard gas?

A seasoned veteran

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Whoa that's a lemon, how much did you pay?

Only $3,200" Dude it's literally a piece of fruit "Damn....not again"

What's the difference between a chick pea and a potato?

You would pay to have a potato on you...

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why aren't there any nails in a lesbian's floor?

A. They're all laid with tongue and groove.

What did the Hammerhead shark say to his buddies when he got laid?

Nailed it.

Salt Jokes More Salt Jokes

Why do so many white people do meth?

Nobody likes a cracker without salt. *I'm white*

Why are League of Legends players the most skeptical people on Earth?

Because they take everything with a grain of salt.

Bend Jokes More Bend Jokes

Why did the Romans build straight roads ?

So their soldiers didn't go around the bend !

Why did the lazy person buy a tall dog?

A: So that they didn't have to bend down to pet it.

Crucify Jokes More Crucify Jokes

How did Jesus feel when they crucified him?

He was cross.

What did Asian Jesus say before he was crucified?

OC) YORO (You only resurrect once)

End Jokes More End Jokes

How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.

How many rocks did Hank Schrader have in his collection by the end of Breaking Bad?

None, they were all minerals.