Rudolph Jokes

Why did the kids not receive presents for Christmas?

Because Rudolph intentionally grounded the team...

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What did Pinocchio say to Rudolph when he asked him what he asked for Christmas?

Quit being nosey.

What was Rudolph's nickname?

Names. Because they used to laugh and call him Names. Credit to my dad.

What did the reindeer wear to protect itself while Santa was watering the garden?

Rudolph's red hose rain gear...

Why did Kim Jong-il die a week before December 25th?

Because Rudolph is the only deer leader at Christmas.

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Kim Jong Il Jokes More Kim Jong Il Jokes

What would Kim Jong-Il be doing if he was still alive today?

Scratching at the lid of his coffin.

How did Kim Jong-Il begin his audio autobiography?

Dear Reader"

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did the strawberry say on December 25th?

Berry Christmas!

What did the orphan get for Christmas?

A family.

Credit Jokes More Credit Jokes

What did the sister cell say to her sister cell when she stepped on her foot?

Ow Mytosis! Credits to Amanda Damiani

Why are the Greeks so in debt?

They demand credit for everything

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did the humanistic psychologist say at Freud's funeral?

He died at such a Jung age.

What do you get when a clown dies in a desert?

Dry Humour.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How do you make stupid children?

I don't know, ask your parents.

Why wouldn't you ask the zebra for music advice?

Because he only knows about The White Stripes.

Protect Jokes More Protect Jokes

How did the cavemen in the far east protect them selves?

They Rocked their doors.

What does stormtrooper armor protect against, exactly?

Knives

Ground Jokes More Ground Jokes

Why couldn't the Dali Lama go out and play with his friends?

Because he was grounded.

What abs?

Me: "The abs hiding under this protective layer of you're grounded."

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What do you call a smoothie that came out too thick?

A chunky. Credit to my dad this morning..

How to scare parents?

Dad: "Can I see your report card, son?" Son: "I don't have it." Dad: "Why?" Son: "I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."