Teddy Jokes

Why did the teddy bear leave the restaurant?

He was stuffed.

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How do you hire a teddy bear?

Put him on stilts !

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Stilt Jokes More Stilt Jokes

How do you go about hiring a horse?

Try two pairs of stilts!

How do you hire a teddy bear?

Put him on stilts !

Dessert Jokes More Dessert Jokes

What do you call two stoners sharing a joint over dessert?

Joint custardy

What do ghosts serve for dessert?

I Scream.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did Comic Sans's girlfriend leave him?

He just wasn't her type.

What is the difference between joghurt and America?

If you leave joghurt alone for 200 years, it will grow a culture!

Stuff Jokes More Stuff Jokes

Why is a sofa like a roast chicken ?

Because they're both full of stuffing !

What's it called when you go around looking for stuff to buy that's made in America?

Antiquing.

Order Jokes More Order Jokes

How was the bear able to move in order to get honey?

It had muscles.

How much does wonton soup weigh?

One ton, but I don't know anyone that'd wantonly order it.

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

Why do pigs like February 14th?

They get lots of Valenswines.

What do you call a pig who's been arrested for dangerous driving ?

A road hog !

House Jokes More House Jokes

Who do you call when theres a fly in your house?

The SWAT team

How do you know an Asian has robbed your house?

They're still in your driveway

Favourite Pasta Jokes More Favourite Pasta Jokes

What's a teddy bears favourite pasta ?

Tagliateddy !

What's a polar bears favourite pasta?

Penguini!