Tolkien Jokes

How does Tolkien make his bread?

With Frodough.

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What's snoop dogg's favorite author?

Tolkien.

How many quarters does it take to play the Lord of the rings pinball game?

None, it only takes Tolkiens

What did the LOTR fan say to the LOTR hater?

What are you Tolkien about...

Why didn't Peter Jackson cast any black actors in The Lord Of The Rings?

He was afraid they wouldn't be taken on their merits, that they'd just be seen as Tolkien blacks.

What did C.S. Lewis say about The Lord of the Rings books?

I don't know what you're Tolkien about!" Yeah, sorry.. I know it's dumb.

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Sauron Jokes More Sauron Jokes

What's Sauron's favorite soft drink?

Mountain Dewm

What kind of dog does Sauron have?

A La-Barad-dr

Connect Jokes More Connect Jokes

What should it sound like when it's connecting?

guy in the back stands up confidently Pterodactyls

Which football team to you need to connect up your computer?

Leeds.

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

Why did you ticket the computer?

Officer: It was speeding along the information highway.

Why did the computer get a virus?

He wasn't using protection.

Frodough Jokes More Frodough Jokes

How does Tolkien make his bread?

With Frodough.

What kind of dough do Hobbit bakers use?

Frodough.

Bread Jokes More Bread Jokes

What does a redneck and yeast have in common?

They are both "in-bread" Downvote me to hell if you want. This is my only joke.

What do you get when you plant a loaf of bread?

A bakery.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why didn't the monk sell his temple?

Thought of this one on my own while playing WoW a couple days ago and I'm pretty sure it hasn't been told before. I like corny jokes. I Googled it and didn't find anything (:

How'd you get amnesia?

4yo:.. Me:.. 4yo: I don't remember. Me: Well played..

Merit Jokes More Merit Jokes

How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.

Why didn't Peter Jackson cast any black actors in The Lord Of The Rings?

He was afraid they wouldn't be taken on their merits, that they'd just be seen as Tolkien blacks.

Ring Jokes More Ring Jokes

How's my driving?

sticker on her car. Her phone hasn't stopped ringing since.

What are the three rings of marriage?

The first one is the engagement ring...the second one is the wedding ring...and the third one is the suffering.