How did the Idiot break his arm while raking leaves?

He fell out of the tree.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What did the guy with no arms and no legs get for christmas?

Cancer.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs that falls into a body of water?

Bob.

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

How do you know when the Moon is going broke?

When it's down to it's last quarter.

What kind of Mechanics fix and break your car at the same time?

Quantum Mechanics.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What is someone who just got left at the alters least favorite fruit?

Cantaloupe

How can you tell a hippie's been in your house?

He's still there when you get home. What's he say when you tell him to leave? "Na, 'ma stay"

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What's the difference between someone falling from 21st floor and 1st floor?

21st floor person goes: AHHHHHHHHHH 1st floor goes: AHHHHHHHHHH

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

How does an elephant go up a tree?

It stands on an acorn and waits for it to grow.

Why does Paris have tree lined streets?

Because the German army likes to march in the shade.

Idiot Jokes More Idiot Jokes

What did the idiot do to the flea in his ear?

Shot it!

Why are there no cats on Mars?

Because there is no oxygen and they'd die from UV radiation, you idiot.

Rake Jokes More Rake Jokes

How did the pollock die raking leaves?

He fell out of the tree.

What do you call an ethiopian with buck teeth?

A rake.