Me: I followed the directions. 20 minutes a pound at 325 degrees. I weigh 175 pounds!
He bit into his flat bread before it was cool!
Eggsalad
The last time I dumped a load into the washing machine, she didn't follow me around for a week!
Because it follows the path of least resistance.
1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise
Smashed potatoes.
They nuke it. OR In Soviet Russia, Turkey fires you!
Because they're both roasted
You just saw me walk into a closed door.
One Direction
Co-worker: *Gives 20 minute dissertation on their gastro infection*
They have to wait 20 minutes before surrendering
At the whale weigh station of course.
Because they can weigh things by eye man.
