What did the man say when the calculator agreed to help him load the car?

I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How much does a slave cost?

I have no idea, I just know they aren't free

Why are white people the scariest in prison?

Because you know they're guilty.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why should you never laugh at thieves in a car-accident?

It could be your car

Why do women like men who can work on cars?

They know how to work under the hood!

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why wasn't the man considered attractive?

The laws of gravity didn't apply to him.

Why are you wearing a tuxedo?

The man responds "If I'm going to be im-po-tant, I want to look im-po-tant!"

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

How much do you love me?

Count the stars in the sky and that's how much I love you "But it's so cloudy" *pats her on the head* Yeah I know

How many dogs does it take to count 14 plates?

14, maybe 15, but only if the plates ... 'run around a lot!'

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

How are you going to pay the Chihuahua who helped you to set up your computer?

With dog diskettes!

What's the difference between organized crime and the government?

Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

How do you get an r/jokes redditor confused?

loading...

What's the difference between a washing machine and a virgin?

A washing machine doesn't follow the guy around for 2 weeks after he drops a load in it.

Calculator Jokes More Calculator Jokes

What do you get when you cross an ape with a calculator?

A Hairy Reasoner. (Andy Rooney used to enjoy this one)

Why did Mike Tyson bring his calculator to church?

He was invited to thunday math.

Agree Jokes More Agree Jokes

What can both Christians and Atheists agree on about Jesus?

Kanye's not him.

Why did you cancel your gym membership?

Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with