What happens when a carpenter drinks with his wife?

He gets hammered and she gets nailed.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

How much for a drink?

The bartender replies, "For you No charge."

What do particle physicists like to drink?

Pina colliders.

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you drop a decimal point in water ?

it floats.

What happens when Keemstar and Ricegum have a baby?

He's born with Diss-lexia

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did Anakin Skywalker cry out as he lay dying and on fire?

Patme! Patme! Credit to my wife on this one

What candy do you give your wife before you get married?

Pre-nup brittle.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why is Jesus bad at hockey?

He always gets nailed to the boards.

What do jesus and girls have in common?

The expression on their faces when they got nailed.

Hammer Jokes More Hammer Jokes

Why did the T-Rex get hammered at noon?

Because he's a Wino-saur!

What did the tool box say to the hammer?

Toolsie!

Carpenter Jokes More Carpenter Jokes

Why don't you ask Joseph, the carpenter?

God: Uh huge grin cos I'm banging his wife raises hand up top

Who was the first carpenter?

Eve, she made Adam's banana stand.