What happens when you stick your hand in a jar of jelly beans?

The black ones steal your watch.

This joke may have profanity.
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Why did the Cold War never happen?

Because Joseph was Stalin.

What happens when you give a cow marijuana?

The "steaks" get higher

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Why doesn't Saran Wrap have any friends?

Because it sticks to itself.

What did the soccer player shout to the baker who's cakes kept sticking to the tin?

LINE IT!"

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What position do u play?

ME: I'm a *thinks back to the only game I watched* wide-retriever.

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Because of the tele-ban.

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What does the Pope use to dry his hands?

Papal towels.

What do you call something that you do to your self with one hand?

A Selfie!

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What duo were famous for stealing horses?

Bonnie and Clydesdale!

Why do the ghosts never win races?

Because they're always dead tired. I stole this from plain and simple. Just straight up stole it. Why? Because it made me laugh and I didn't see it posted here before.

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It said "twist to open"

What do you call a jar of mayonnaise stuck in quicksand?

Sinko de mayo

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What Do People Have In Common With Jellybeans?

Nobody likes the black ones.

What happens when you stick your hand into a jar of jelly beans?

The black ones steal your watch and the yellow ones paint your nails.

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What happens when you stick your hand into a jar of jelly beans?

The black ones steal your watch and the yellow ones paint your nails.