When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

for 2 weeks.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What did people call Putin after he lost an arm?

Amputin

Where is the lost city of Atlantis?

Lantis. I can't believe nobody has thought to look there yet.

People Jokes More People Jokes

How many didn't?

Ten. (Shame this one doesn't work too well for reddit - the funniest part of this joke is the third punchline enjoying people struggle to understand what the hell you're talking about.)

What kind of people should you stay away from?

Trees. They're quite shady.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

How many..." How many blacks do you need to start a riot?

Minus one.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend when he broke up with her?

I need some space.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

How many grains of sand are there in the world?

As many as 27. I'm referring to the number of times good ol' 27 was reposted.

What did the number zero say to the number 8?

I like your belt

Phone Jokes More Phone Jokes

Why hasn't a phone that charges itself just by scrolling the screen ever been invented?

What are our scientists doing

How does a door chime answer the phone?

Bella

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

What did the golfer say to his buddy when he hit a bogey?

I guess you aren't up to par"

What are you typing?

Let me guess. Oh wait, stop right there, I know what it is. It's not that Okay wait.. I know it, I know it!" -Google.

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

How do you troll someone?

Make them wipe their screen because they think text is a smudge.

What is it with people who text and drive?

I swear to god the next time I see this happen, I'll roll down my window and throw my beer at them.

Facebook Jokes More Facebook Jokes

Why did voldermort used Twitter instead of Facebook?

Because he only had followers. Not friends.

Whatsapp &amp?

Facebook?

2 Week Jokes More 2 Week Jokes

What do you call a meth-head that's been up for 2 weeks?

A two-weeker

What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit !