Facebook Jokes

What's the difference between Reddit and Facebook?

About a day

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

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How did realism get me banned from Facebook?

I sided with cancer on the "Kids VS Cancer" page.

What Slenderman doesnt have?

Facebook.

What is Facebook?

Its a Place where Boy posts a JOKE and Gets no Response & If a Girl Posts the same JOKE , She gets Hundreds of likes , comments and Friend Requests and Lots of PM's .

When you realise your friend is an idiot" Stories!?

Hey guys, I just recently found out that my friend is an idiot. I was talking with him on Facebook and I was telling him about this game that was free online, and he says "I'm on my way to see my girlfriend". I'm sorry but WHAT? well I have a fish tank. Feel free to comment down below your stories about how you realised your friend is an idiot.

How does a Facebook employee greet each other?

Hey there, whatsapp!!

What's the difference between a joke and your friend's blog?

You enjoy it when a joke is posted on Facebook

Whatsapp & Facebook?

My Dad:We used to keep useless information to ourselves.

Why do proctologists like Facebook?

It's another chance to look up old friends.

Who and Facebook?

When the Doctor changes the timeline, it's usually for a good reason.

What's the alien version of Facebook?

Spacebook. (It's a terrible joke I know).

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Why couldn't the lumberjack sign into Facebook?

Because he was logged out!

What'd be worse?

Zombie apocalypse or Facebook shutting down and 500 million retards all of sudden using twitter

How do you now when somebody is retarded on Facebook?

Well, its complicated.

What did you do?

Genocide. You " "I shared a 10 Funniest Autocorrect FAILS on Facebook." - Conversations in Hell

What if you go missing?

How do you expect us to find you if you look like beyonce on Facebook.

What did Drake Bell say to Batman?

Sorry, still calling you Bruce! I found this on Facebook somewhere; I dunno who to get credit to.

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

for 2 weeks.

Why is Reddit different from Facebook?

removed

Why is Facebook such a hit?

It works on the principle that People are more interested in others life than their own'.

How does Stevie Wonder check Facebook?

With his EyePhone

How do you tell if you've lost an argument on Facebook?

Well first you're are in an argument on Facebook.

Which is more environment-friendly: Facebook or r/jokes?

Facebook produces too much plastics while r/jokes has 100% recycling rate.

Whatsapp &amp?

Facebook?

Why are these Facebook status updates so much more interesting than usual?

Oh, because this isn't Facebook - it's a mattress label. My bad.

Whats the difference between Facebook and Reddit?

About two hours.

How to pick up chicks at the gym Pasted from Facebook: A man asks a trainer in the gym: "I want to impress that beautiful girl, which machine can I use?

Trainer replies: "Use the ATM"

Why did voldermort used Twitter instead of Facebook?

Because he only had followers. Not friends.

Why do people post missing person posts on Facebook?

Like we're going outside...

What I hated the most in Facebook?

See more

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Waste Jokes More Waste Jokes

How do you call 4 blacks in a car falling off the cliff?

A waste. You could fit 1 more in the trunk.

What do you call a blonde lesbian?

A: A waste.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What does the zero say to the eight?

I like your belt. Ok, ok. I know it's elementary, but I still love it.

What did the fisherman do when he really liked a woman?

He invited her over to net fish and krill.

Conversation Jokes More Conversation Jokes

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

Conversation

What a crazy weekend! Me: *takes a knee* CW: What are you doing?

M: Protesting this conversation.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What did the thunder say when it understood the joke?

I feel so enlightninged!

How did the toad feel in the morning?

A little bit froggy

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why was 1 all salty?

Someone told him it was 2's day.

How can you tell a Minnesota hockey fan?

Ask him what color the blue line is and wait. It may take him ten minutes to answer.

Plastic Jokes More Plastic Jokes

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a Xbox?

They're both made of plastic, and little kids turn them on.

What is the cost of plastic surgery?

Doctor: It is near about 10,000$. Patient: Well, what if we arrange the plastic

Response Jokes More Response Jokes

What has four fingers and a thumb but is not alive?

A glove.) First response: "My Aunt Lydia."

What did the sophisticated cow say in response to another cow's joke?

That was very amoosing"

Teenager Jokes More Teenager Jokes

What was the buffalo's last words to his teenager as he sent him off to college?

Bison

How many teenagers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None because it's already lit fam