Why are gifts in airports so expensive?

God's punishing you for waiting until the flight home to buy your wife a gift.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What is the difference between the deflate gate controversy and my wife?

Only one shows an interest in the balls.

What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine's Day?

Rugs and kisses!

Gift Jokes More Gift Jokes

What do gifted bakers take in high school?

AP Flour

Why did your sister refuse the gift of a Japanese car ?

Because she'd never be able to learn the language

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Whats Saudi Arabia's highest rated sitcom?

How I bought your mother

Why did the terrorist buy himself a Porsche?

He was going through a midlife ISIS :(

God Jokes More God Jokes

What do you call it when you talk to God?

Praying. Now what do you call it when God talks to you? Schizophrenia, it's called schizophrenia.

What do you call the god of cheese?

Cheesus

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How do you make a rabbit stew?

Keep it waiting.

What are we waiting for?

the doctor asks. "Patients, Doctor," replied the nurse. "Patients."

Airport Jokes More Airport Jokes

Why can't Admiral Ackbar fly to Hawaii?

Aloha Ackbar" doesn't go over well at the airport

Why was Kim Kardashian arrested at the airport?

She had two pounds of crack in her knickers.

Punish Jokes More Punish Jokes

How did Helen Keller's mother punish her?

She left a plunger in the toilet

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her?

By leaving a plunger in the toilet