Why do New Zealand farmers now wear kilts?

Because the sheep have gotten used to the sound of zippers

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How do you divide old Rome?

Using a pair of Caesars.

Who was the least funny U.S. President?

FDR. His standup could use some work.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What do you call a whale that isn't wearing any underwear?

Free Willy

What kind of underwear does a person wear when buried?

Fruit of the tomb

Sound Jokes More Sound Jokes

What's the sound of a one-handed corpse clapping?

Dead silence. What's the sound of a one-handed zombie clapping? Undead silence. Thanks to my gaming group for those.

What does a North Korean ricochet sound like?

PYONG! YANG!

New Zealand Jokes More New Zealand Jokes

What do you call a shorn sheep in a New Zealand bar?

A skimpy.

Why do New Zealand race horses run faster than other race horses?

They saw what happened to the sheep

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What are the two biggest lies in Wyoming?

My truck is paid for, and honestly officer, I was just helping the sheep over the fence.

What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangaroo?

A wooly jumper!

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

What does a Scotsman wear under his kilt?

The codpiece he made out of his girlfriend's face.

What did the Scottish man do when he ran out of pants to wear?

He kilt himself