Zipper Jokes

What has 42 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk?

My Zipper.

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What has 125 teeth and prevents a savage beast from escaping?

My zipper.

Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Because their sheep can hear zippers.

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away

Why do Scottish men wear kilts instead of jeans?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Why do New Zealand farmers now wear kilts?

Because the sheep have gotten used to the sound of zippers

What has 52 teeth and can hold back the incredible Hulk?

My Zipper

What has 142 teeths and can hold back the incredible hulk?

My zipper

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk?

My Zipper

Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

What has 72 teeth and can hold back the Incredible Hulk?

My zipper.

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What has 200 teeth and holds back Godzilla?

My zipper

Why do Scots wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Why do the Irish wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

What has 72 teeth and holds back the hulk?

My zipper.

What has 100 teeth and keeps Godzilla at bay?

My zipper

What has over a hundred teeth and keeps back Godzilla?

my zipper!

What has 341 teeth and holds back The Hulk?

My zipper.

Why do they wear skirts in New Zealand?

Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Why do Arabs wear thawbs?

Goats can hear a zipper from a mile away.

What has 40 teeth and holds a monster at bay?

My zipper.

What has 108 teeth and holds back the incredible Hulk?

My Zipper.

Why do Scotsman wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

What has 32 teeth and holds back a monster?

My zipper.

What has 100 teeth and holds back a monster?

My zipper.

Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.

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Scot Jokes More Scot Jokes

What's the difference between a German and a Scot?

The German knows when he's not speaking English.

How many Scots didn't turn up to vote?

One in Fife

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Why did the sheep jump into the lake?

A: He wanted to take a ba-a-a-th.

How do you milk sheep?

A: With iPhone accessories.

Mile Jokes More Mile Jokes

Why do Scotsman wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

What is the longest word?

Smiles... It has a mile between the two 'S's

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

Why do Irish stew recipes only call for 239 beans?

Because one more, and it would be too-farty.

What's Irish and stays out all night?

Patio Furniture

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What'll happen if a piano is dropped on a man?

He will B flat

What do you call a man who jokes that women always make mountains out of molehills?

An ambulance.

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottish shepard?

The Stones say "hey you get off of my cloud!" The Shepard says "hey Mc Cloud get of of my ewe!"

What do you call the Scottish dentist ?

Phil McCavity !

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

Why do Scots wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

How did the Scot die?

He got kilt.

Escape Jokes More Escape Jokes

How do you escape a fascist authoritarian regime?

By getting aboard (a) voat

What did the policeman say when the Arabic man escaped from jail?

GOTTA CATCH JAMAL