Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What do you call an elephant with a carrot in each ear ?

Anything you want as he can't hear you !

Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?

He had a very esteemed colleague.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the blonde wear green lipstick?

Because red means stop D

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip of the broom. :)

Mile Jokes More Mile Jokes

What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?

A blonde parade!

Why do the Irish wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?

The baa-baa shop.

How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What's an Apple Scottish self-aware computer called?

I, Mac.

What is the anthem for Scottish Engineers?

A: "All the Single Laddies" Edit: Read it carefully

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

What has 200 teeth and holds back Godzilla?

My zipper

What has 108 teeth and holds back the incredible Hulk?

My Zipper.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

What does robbing a Scotsman get you?

Kilt

What does a Scotsman wear under his kilt?

The codpiece he made out of his girlfriend's face.

Scottish People Jokes More Scottish People Jokes

What do the Scottish people call iPhone?

A: an AYE-Phone. (Joke brought to you by a 5 year old)

Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.