Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Because their sheep can hear zippers.

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What does a cat say when you tread on its tail?

ME-OW! I am very sorry. Just thought of it and felt like everyone should hear it. Maybe some jokes are better left untold...

Why isn't anyone afraid of China?

Because everyone knows General Tsao's chicken. Heard from a friend today. :)

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why don't women wear watches?

Because there's a perfectly good clock on the stove

What kind of overalls does Mario wear?

Denim, denim, denim.

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a scottish sheep herder?

One says, "hey, you! Get off my cloud!", and the other one says, "hey, McCloud! Get off of my ewe!"

What does the Scottish man say after love making?

I love ewe!

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

Why do New Zealand farmers now wear kilts?

Because the sheep have gotten used to the sound of zippers

What has 125 teeth and prevents a savage beast from escaping?

My zipper.

Scottish Man Jokes More Scottish Man Jokes

How can you tell what clan a Scottish man is from?

Look under his kilt and if he has a quarter pounder then he is a McDonald.

Why did they bury the Scottish man on the West side of the hill?

Because he was dead

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.

How did the Scot die?

He got kilt.