Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Because their sheep can hear zippers.

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?

He just took it in stride

Whats the worst thing to hear when you have explosive diarrhea?

Are you ticklish?"

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What does a man with two left feet wear to the beach?

Flip-Flips.

What should you wear when drinking tea?

A tea-shirt.

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?

A chocolate BAAA

What time zone are you in when you find a sheep stuck in a fence?

Mountin' time

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What is the anthem for Scottish Engineers?

A: "All the Single Laddies" Edit: Read it carefully

Whats the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger sings eh you, get offa mai cloud, but the Scottish farmer says eh McLeod, get offa mai ewe!

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

What has 100 teeth and keeps Godzilla at bay?

My zipper

Why do Scotsman wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

Scottish Man Jokes More Scottish Man Jokes

What does the Scottish man say after love making?

I love ewe!

What do you call a Scottish man with no arms and no legs?

a bell.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.

How can you tell the clan of a Scotsman?

Look under his kilt, if it's a quarter-pounder, he's a McDonald.