New Zealand Jokes

How do men in New Zealand address their women?

Hey! Ewe!"

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What do you call a shorn sheep in a New Zealand bar?

A skimpy.

Why do New Zealand farmers now wear kilts?

Because the sheep have gotten used to the sound of zippers

What would New Zealand be called if it had a fascist government?

Not Zealand.

What do you call a sheep tied to a lamp post in New Zealand?

A community centre

Why do they wear skirts in New Zealand?

Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Why do New Zealand race horses run faster than other race horses?

They saw what happened to the sheep

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Pimp Jokes More Pimp Jokes

What do Pimps and Santa have in common?

They stay with 3 ho's

What do you call a redneck with two sheep?

A Pimp

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What bleeds once a month in the mouth?

Me, when I remember to floss once a month. Edit: account got hacked and showed something different. Sorry about that

What is a pirates favorite article of clothing?

His sc*aaarrrr*f Edit: I get it guys, you all have better punchlines than me.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

What do you call a man with a kilt over his head ?

Scott !

Why do New Zealand farmers now wear kilts?

Because the sheep have gotten used to the sound of zippers

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

What has 42 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk?

My Zipper.

Why do they wear skirts in New Zealand?

Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Race Horse Jokes More Race Horse Jokes

What do you call a racing horse that's never been groomed?

Furlong

Why do New Zealand race horses run faster than other race horses?

They saw what happened to the sheep

Post Jokes More Post Jokes

Where do Polar Bears keep their money?

In the Snowbank. My first post is a dad joke LOL

What did the redditor say when he opened his package from the UniBomber?

Wow, I did not expect this post to blow up

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a robot?

Steel wool

What do you get if you cross a dog and a sheep ?

A sheep that can round itself up !

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What has 2 legs but can not walk?

A cripple.

Why do Avon ladies walk funny?

because their lipstick