Why isn't Barney the Dinosaur allowed to drive?

A: Because everybody knows -- tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you get when you chop up a fruit and mix it with vegetables?

I don't know but it was hard as hell stealing thier wheelchairs with pieces of Richard Simmons tripping me up.

How do you know if a flock of geese is from Canada?

They fly in an 'A' (eh)

Allow Jokes More Allow Jokes

Why did the vulture fly United Airlines?

Because they allow 1 free carrion

What's the difference between a toilet and a sink?

Aaaand you're not allowed in my house anymore.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why did Renault name a car "Le Car"?

So customers wouldn't accidentally drive Le Lawnmower to work.

Why are so many Koreans named Park?

Because the ones named Drive all died in crashes.

Dinosaur Jokes More Dinosaur Jokes

What do you call a dinosaur who knows how to please its woman?

A Lickalottapus

Why do dinosaurs climb trees?

There's nothing else to climb in the jungle.

Everybody Jokes More Everybody Jokes

Why did Marie from Everybody Loves Raymond never get a divorce?

She didn't want an ex Ray Edit: I meant debra

What do a big bar of chocolate and a frag grenade have in common?

Everybody gets a piece.

Barney Jokes More Barney Jokes

What's green and purple and goes up and down?

A: Barney in an elevator.

Why isn't Barney the Dinosaur allowed to drive?

A: Because everybody knows -- tyrannosaurus wrecks.

Tyrannosaurus Wreck Jokes More Tyrannosaurus Wreck Jokes

Why isn't Barney the Dinosaur allowed to drive?

A: Because everybody knows -- tyrannosaurus wrecks.

What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?

A: Tyrannosaurus wrecks!