Accomplish Jokes

What was the last thing Beethoven accomplished?

Decomposing

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Why is steak harder to cook than spinach?

It takes a lot more thyme to accomplish.

What do I have to do?

F-Well I know you, so I'm expecting very little. Mission accomplished.

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Beethoven Jokes More Beethoven Jokes

What did Beethoven the dog shed in a moment of genius?

Fur Elise

Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?

All they said was, Bach, Bach, Bach

Decompose Jokes More Decompose Jokes

What was the last thing Beethoven accomplished?

Decomposing

What does the calm zombie say to the agitated zombie?

Decompose yourself.

Steak Jokes More Steak Jokes

Why don't midgets like barbecues?

because the steaks are too high.

What's a vampire cows worst fear?

Steaks.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why can't you use sarcasm with a kleptomaniac?

Because they take things literally.

Why does Islam get angry if you criticize their religion?

Im not sure they always seem to blow things up out of proportion.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why'd the dog cross the road?

Cause he's a dog.

What do you get if you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?

A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.

Mission Jokes More Mission Jokes

What does a tweaker and a Jehovah's Witness have in common?

Both ride bicycles and are on a mission.

What do mormons and tweakers have in common?

They both ride bikes and are on a mission.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What do you call a group of Mexicans smoking weed?

Baked beans

Why did the 14 year old Mexican girl end up pregnant?

Because her teacher told her to go do an essay.

Expect Jokes More Expect Jokes

What the hell did you expect for ten dollars?

Lobster "

How do you know when it's time to get a new dishwasher?

When the old one expects you to "do your share"