Decompose Jokes

What was the last thing Beethoven accomplished?

Decomposing

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What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...

What did Mozart and Beethoven do whilst in the grave?

Decompose

Why did the stressed out zombie go on vacation?

He needed some time to himself to decompose.

What's Mozart doing?

decomposing.

What is Beethoven doing right now?

Decomposing.

Why's the necrophiliac's blow up doll half inflated?

So he can pretend she's decomposing.

What are Mozart and Beethoven up to these days?

They're both Decomposing

What's Beethoven up to these days?

Decomposing

What's Beethoven doing in his grave?

He's decomposing.

What is mozart doing nowadays?

Decomposing

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What does the calm zombie say to the agitated zombie?

Decompose yourself.

What do hospitals and refrigerators have in common?

If you pull the plug, the vegetables start to decompose.

What do songwriters do after they die?

They decompose

What do you think Mozart is doing right now?

Decomposing.

What did Beethoven do when he died?

Decompose.

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What starts and ends with a 'v' and is only one letter?

How many Survivors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: One to start screwing it in and the rest to vote 'em off the ladder.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What is the last thing you want to hear after blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson' Credit: old joke via: Norm Macdonald

What is the only thing more permanent than a Sharpie marker?

A STD.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why are fire trucks always red?

You'd turn red if someone pulled on your hose wouldn't you?

What did Luke get for pulling Darth Vader's face mask off?

A 15 yard penalty.

Dead Body Jokes More Dead Body Jokes

What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...

What is the best place to hide a dead body?

On the second page of google.

Mozart Jokes More Mozart Jokes

What do I get when I raise up a platform to play Mozart?

Amadeus on my dais.

What's Mozart doing?

decomposing.

Plug Jokes More Plug Jokes

How many plug-in air fresheners does it take to mask the decay of human flesh?

I'm asking for for a friend.

What did the cork say to the bottle?

If you don't behave yourself, I'll plug you.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why did the dog die?

It had Barkinsons

Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do a prison and a concentration camp have in common?

What do a prison and a concentration camp have in common? In both people don't feel like showering.

Why do people with heart disease always lose at poker?

They have to take ACE inhibitors.