Mozart Jokes

What did Mozart yell when he became a crusader?

Amadeus Vult!

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Why couldn't Mozart find his mentor?

Because he was Haydn

What did Mozart and Beethoven do whilst in the grave?

Decompose

What's Mozart doing?

decomposing.

What do people call Mozart and Beethoven after they died?

Decomposers

What are Mozart and Beethoven up to these days?

They're both Decomposing

What is Mozart doing right now?

De-composing

Why did Mozart get rid of his chickens?

Because they kept saying "Bach, bach, bach"

What do I get when I raise up a platform to play Mozart?

Amadeus on my dais.

Why did Mozart hate chickens?

Because they all they ever say is Bach! Bach! Bach!

What did Mozart say to the police clerk?

I'll be Bach" hahaha. What do you mean they're different people

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Why did Beethoven hate Mozart?

Because Mozart stabbed him in the Bach.

What was Mozart's first movement?

His bowels.

Why have they not found Mozart's body yet?

Because he is Haydn.

Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

A: Because he's Haydn!

What do you think Mozart is doing right now?

Decomposing.

What does Mozart put on his front lawn?

Metrognomes

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Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What do lawyers do after they die?

They lie still.

What do you do when a Chemist dies?

You Barium.

Bach Jokes More Bach Jokes

Which member of the Bach family went to prison?

Bachgen Drwg. (it's welsh)

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he and his friends decided to dress up as famous composers for Halloween?

I'll be Bach

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What did the man say when the calculator agreed to help him load the car?

I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU

How do you know when your dog is a bad hot dog?

When it's pure bread.

Grave Jokes More Grave Jokes

How do Etheopians celebrate their first birthday?

By putting flowers on the grave

What's Beethoven doing in his grave?

He's decomposing.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What's the difference between a pun and a copy of Cliff's Notes?

A pun is a play on words, while Cliff's notes are a word on plays

Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?

Because then the children have to play inside.

Stab Jokes More Stab Jokes

How was the beach?

You hang ten or what " No but I stabbed a couple because they kept asking stupid questions about my vacation

What celebrity is most likely to stab you?

James Blunt

Metrognome Jokes More Metrognome Jokes

What do you call a punctual urban garden gnome?

A metrognome.

What does Mozart put on his front lawn?

Metrognomes

Compose Jokes More Compose Jokes

What do Beethoven's 9th and a dead baby have in common?

They're both D-composed.

What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...