Comic Jokes

What's the difference between a political speech and a stand-up comic show?

They both tell the audience what they are glad to hear. But at the end, the audience laughs at the comic, and the politician laughs at the audience.

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Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery?

Q: Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery? A: Because her career as a comic was stuck, but no matter how he tried, the Dr. couldn't pull a laugh out of her.

What should you do if a vampire borrows your comic?

Wait for him to give it back.

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Redditor Jokes More Redditor Jokes

How do you disappoint a redditor?

Repost

Why can't redditors sew?

Because the thread has been locked by a moderator

Joan Rivers Jokes More Joan Rivers Jokes

Who has the easiest job in the world right now?

Joan Rivers' embalmer.

What did Joan Rivers say to God when she arrived?

Get a new robe!

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why didn't the table want to be sat on?

He wasn't a charitable guy

Why did the otter want to work at NASA?

So he could go to Otter Space.

Superhero Jokes More Superhero Jokes

What superhero consists of only 16 atoms?

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!!

Why did the superhero make a lot of shredded cheese?

It was for the grater good.

Comic Book Jokes More Comic Book Jokes

What did the magazine say to the comic book?

Boy, do we have issues!

My older brother always tore the last pages of my comic books, and never told me why.

I had to draw my own conclusions.

Font Jokes More Font Jokes

Why did the architect take so long to get started on his church blueprints?

He couldn't decide what font to use.

What did one font say to the other while at the beach?

Serifs up, dude!"

Magazine Jokes More Magazine Jokes

What's a magazine?

asked every guy under 30.

What do you call a 5 year old kid with no friends?

A Sandy Hook survivor All they wanted was books but instead they got magazines

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

What's the most dangerous place in Washington D.C.?

Between a politician and a news camera.

What do you call a politician in a house fire?

Burning Sanders!